So Weird

It's still so weird! April and I were eating lunch today when we both kinda realized how weird it is that we actually have a baby. We were watching other couples holding babies or pushing strollers and thinking about how weird it's going to be when we can actually take Lincoln out somewhere. To be really honest, in some ways...right now it feels like we're sorta playing house. Sometimes it feels like we're just visiting a baby in the hospital. Obviously Lincoln totally feels like ours...and we love him a ton! It's just sorta discouraging to watch other families do stuff other than just sit in a hospital all day. The point at which he will able to come home...when we can actually put his car seat and stroller to use...when we can walk into his room and see him asleep in his crib...when we can sit and rock with him...these things feel so far off sometimes. It's like this...yeah of course we know we have a baby...but when we leave the hospital each day...it's always a little hard, like something is just not right. It's almost like I feel like asking someone, "Remind me again, why do we have to leave our son at the hospital when everyone else gets to take their kids home?" I guess there are just some times when reality kinda stings us a little bit. We're reminded of what's really going on.

The good news is that Lincoln is still doing really good. He's consistently gaining weight, in fact as of last night he weighed 3lbs 15oz. Another piece of good news is that the nurses have been able to decrease the nutrients going through his IV over the last couple of days...which means that pretty soon they'll be able to take it out of him. This is another good sign that Lincoln is progressing well. Today one of the doctors suggested a few things to improve his oxygen levels and while we were there tonight, his oxygen saturation never fell below 94 :-)

Many of you have been asking about how April and I are doing. I'm always hesitant to spend too much time talking about us to anyone...whether it's here on the blog or in person. I guess I just feel like there are so many other people out there in much worse off situations. But, to answer the question of "How we're doing" - I would say we're doing pretty good. Speaking for the both of us - this has been an experience so far that just reinforces how much we love each other. That we're in the adventure of life together (not just in the present but far into whatever happens in the many years to come). I've heard a lot of people talk about how the birth of your child changes you. I always just smiled and shook my head...not knowing the real truth of that statement. Needless to say, the birth of Lincoln has changed us. I'm not sure that the frailty of life has ever been more real to me...it's forced us to look and think about life from a different perspective. Now as I sit here tonight...I'm reminded that it's been three weeks since Lincoln was born. I can honestly tell you that April and I are thankful for everything that's happened. We know that what has happened in the past and everything that will happen in the future (whatever that is) is not up to us. We're not in control and it gives us a sense of peace.

33 weeks

Yeah! Good numbers!